I feel like...

I have no one to talk to. I don't have a person that I just talk to and know that they'll keep my secrets. Someone that can help me come to conclusions... someone that will always be there for me.
I don't know who to talk to...
I don't know who to trust.

I need someone who is mine. Someone who shares secrets with me and I can share them back.
But I'm a possessive person. I don't like to share. And I guess that makes it hard for people to want to be my friend. I'm too demanding. I expect way too much out of people. And I'm doomed to be disappointed.

I have so much to say right now, but no one to talk to...
I feel alone even though I know I'm not...
I feel that people who are my friends are either: 1. untrustworthy or 2. don't especially like me

I miss the good ol' times... back in high school... I think the happiest I ever was with Becky and Matt, just goofing off... I miss those times.
Or maybe with Collin driving around to no real destination.
Or at VCU, just doing things with my friends.

I'm stuck in a rut, I can't get out.
And I think I'm going to do something to change these things.
But... it's something life changing.
And its not going to be nice or fun.
I just need to do it for my sake, for his sake, for everyone's sake.
I need a lifestyle change... and well no one except me can change it.